I Believe In You

I've been thinking, over the past two days, about some of the things that are the most important to me.  If you're married, think about the one thing that makes your marriage special.  If you're not married, give some thought to the friends that you have and what makes those friendships unique.
I have given some thought to my own marriage, and, the friendships I have with people and what one common thread makes them all special.
When Becky and I hadn't been married that long, we had a conversation that involved trust for one another and the vital part that it played in maintaining a strong and successful marriage. 
I worked with a woman who was nearly old enough to be my mother.  She was someone that I cared about.  I enjoyed the conversations we had about life and about our families.  Our relationship was always appropriate.  This woman asked me one day if I wanted to go get a burger for lunch.  I responded that I would if someone else came with us.  She gave me a funny look as if I was crazy.  I explained to her that I knew it might sound crazy but that it just doesn't look good.  It would be my luck that I would run into somebody that I knew and then their thoughts would run crazy about me being alone with another woman.  Becky and I vowed to each other that even at work we would not go to lunch with someone of the opposite sex, alone.  The appearance doesn't look good and I wouldn't ever want Becky to have reason to not trust me.  "Self-trust is the first secret of success."(Ralph Waldo Emerson)  I want to do things that allow me to maintain trust for myself.
There isn't a day that goes by that I don't think about the decisions I make.  Each one is based on trust or the trust that would be lost by making a poor one.
I have friends that I would trust with my own life.  I believe that no matter what, they would guard my heart and all would be well.  The number of these kinds of friends is smaller in number but important none the less.
I want to be a person that others can trust.  When I say that I'll do something, there should be no question that it will get done.  When I say that I'm in one place, it is sure that I am there.  When someone tells me something in confidence, they can be sure that I will not tell another person...PERIOD!
These are the things that I want to do.  There is a saying,"that it is better to be trusted , than it is to be loved."  I believe that is true.

We All Want A Friend

I love a good story.  Here is one for you that I read and enjoyed immensely.

There was a time when Whitney didn't have a lot of friends. She was a bit shy and reserved. She never really wanted to be popular, but she did want to have someone to share secrets and laughs with. All through high school, though, she just slipped in and out of "light" friendships where she didn't find a lot of comfort or companionship.

When it came time to go to college, Whitney was quite nervous. She was going to be rooming with someone she didn't know and living in a town 300 miles away from home. There wouldn't be a single person she knew in town. She had no idea how she was going to make friends in this new environment. The first week of classes, something happened that changed Whitney's life forever. In her English Composition class, she was asked (as were all the students) to share a little about herself. She told everyone where she called home and all of the other ordinary details that students share in such situations. The final question for each student was always the same: "What is your goal for this class?" Now, most of the students said it was to get a good grade, pass the class or something similar, but for some reason, Whitney said something entirely different. She said that her goal was to make just one good friend.  While most of the students sat in silence, one student came to Whitney and held out his hand and introduced himself. He asked if she would be his friend. The whole room was silent – all eyes focused on the Whitney and the hand extended just in front of her. She smiled and stretched her hand out to take his and a friendship was formed. It was a friendship that lasted all through college.

Everyone wants to feel needed.  Several years ago, I was leading a group of young men at church.  After church, on Sunday afternoon, I would take two boys to visit a few elderly people.  One visit was to a ninety-two year old woman.  She was very friendly but old and fragile.  She didn't remember who we were until we had been there a few minutes and then her mind would spin into action and she remembered precisely who we were.  One Sunday afternoon, we stopped by for our visit and her seventy year old daughter answered the door.  She invited us in.  I said hello to this elderly friend of ours.  She sat silent and starred at me.  "You are the most handsome man I have ever seen," she said.  I didn't know who she was talking about but I took what she said as a compliment.  I walked over and sat next to her on the old couch.  I reached over and held her hand.  When I looked at her face she smiled and gently squeezed my hand.

Each one of us longs for someone to love and care about us.  We can brighten someone else's day by acts that we consider simple.  Let's be that friend.
I want to try something a little different beginning on Monday.  I hope that all next week the blog will be devoted to uplifting personal stories from the readership of this blog.  Will you please send me your own personal stories about friendship and the impact a good friend has had in your life? I would like to hear from some of you all next week.  Email those to dfish0223@yahoo.com.

Family Time

I love to spend time with my family!
Becky and I just got home from taking the boys to see a movie.  We saw "We bought a zoo."  Great show!
I called home, this morning, to chat with Becky.  I asked how everything was at home.  Becky said that her and the boys were getting ready to go to the movie.  She asked if I could go with them.  At first, I thought that today was probably not the best day for me to do that.  I got off of the phone with her and thought about the memories that I could make by taking a little time off of work to go to the show.  My decision was a no-brainer. 
There isn't anybody that doesn't understand how busy life can get.  Our family is the exact same.  I encourage you to take the opportunity to spend quality time with your family.  It may seem inconvenient at times but the pay-off is huge.
The memory I made today was one that I will remember and think about for a long time.
Let me share a personal experience I had in my childhood.  My older brother and I were out in the front of our home playing catch with the baseball.  We could throw the ball back and forth for hours and never tire or get bored.  While we were playing catch, our dad pulled in the driveway from a long day at work.  We understood that he had church responsibilities that he was leaving to fulfill and so we never pressured him to play.  He got out of the car and said hello and asked us about how the day had gone for us.  He went into the house to check on mom, like he always did.  Ten minutes passed by and the front door of the house opened.  Dad had changed out of his suit and had his baseball glove on his left hand.  We asked what he was doing because we knew that he had other commitments.  He said that he had made other arrangements for the evening and that he was going to stay home and play catch with us boys.  We played until our arms were sore.  It was a memorable moment in time.  I was happy that dad had spent that time with us.
That was many years ago and yet, my mind sees it as very clear. 
I want to make decisions that will impact the lives of each member of our family positively.  I love to spend time with my family and I hope you do too!

Faith In Every Footstep

There is always a lesson to be learned and today was no different.  Let me share an experience that touched my heart.
Our oldest daughter, Natalie, spent some time up in the night ill.  Becky and I didn't hear her at all in the downstairs bathroom.
Becky and I had no idea that she had been up until she told us this morning.  She questioned whether to stay home from school.  There really wasn't that option, today.  She asked my opinion and I thought back on the many times in my life, for many different reasons, I have gotten little sleep.  I told her that she needed to go to school and that I would give her a blessing of strength and that she needed to exercise faith that she would have the strength that she needed to make it through the day. 
I wondered how her day had gone.  When I got home from work, I asked her how her day had gone.  She smiled and told me that it had gone well.  She expressed her gratitude to Becky and I for teaching her about faith.  She was thankful that she had learned a valuable lesson today on faith. 
I love when a lesson is learned.  It's been another great day of learning.

Think Positive

Some days are a struggle to think positively.  Today seems to be one of those days, for me. 
I recently read an article that stated the results from a survey taken where one thousand people were polled.  This question was asked of each individual.  "What do you do at the beginning of your day to establish a positive mind set?"  There were a variety of answers but the overwhelming winner was, "I tell myself that the day is going to be good."  I about laughed right out loud because I thought that people were going to expect some sort of magical answer.  If I would have been polled, I would have been with the majority.  I firmly belief, (this was taught to me in my childhood by my parents) that each one of us has to be the controller of whether the day is good or bad.  Nobody else can dictate that outcome for us.
I have said it before but I have the luxury of being married to Mrs. Positive herself.  She knows what it means to have mind over matter.  I appreciate that outlook immensely.
For those who are reading this, today, who are having a less than extraordinary day, my advice to you is think of something that has blessed your life and changed who you are for the better.  There is that one time for all of us.  Sometimes we need to review our happiest times to remind us that life, is in fact, a pleasant existence.  Like the survey taught, "I tell myself that the day is going to be good!"  And it will be.
Those of you who are having a great day I applaud you for your effort in making the day what is. 
I must admit that just since I sat down to write this small piece, I already feel better about the second half of my day.  I appreciate my life and those people in it that bring me the greatest joy.  I have much to be grateful for and you do too.  Remember to make the most of the moments in your life.  They come and go so quickly.

Now That's Special

In 1987, I had the good fortune of witnessing an athletic performance that has had a profound impact on my life, particularly in regard to how I work with young people in teaching and coaching. 

I found a seat in front of the floor exercise area and enjoyed watching athletes of all ages and abilities perform their tumbling routines.  As the competition came to a close, the last participant was rolled onto the floor in a wheelchair.  Assisted by his coach, the athlete with Cerebral Palsy stood, and positioned himself in the middle of the floor.  Bent at the waist, his arms and legs severely contracted, I realized that every muscle in his body was fighting against his will to control them.  After helping him stabilize, the coach exited the arena with the wheelchair, leaving him standing alone, facing a full grandstand.  A hush tumbled over the crowd as if everyone was thinking, “What is he going to do?”  We had watched athletes run, jump, turn cartwheels, perform forward and backward rolls. I too wondered, “What could his constricted body possibly do?”  For several minutes all eyes were fixed on this young man, as he attempted to hold his body still.  He lifted his right foot, lost his balance, put it back down and steadied himself.  A few more long moments passed before he again tried to lift his foot with the same result.  At that moment, it was apparent that his floor exercise was to balance on one foot.  As if everyone in the stands realized this at once, the energy began to rise in anticipation and support for this courageous Special Olympian.  He tried twice more – gaining confidence with each attempt.  There was another lengthy pause before his fifth try. When again, summoning all the concentration he could muster to gain control of a body that had never followed instructions, he raised his right foot and balanced on his left for almost 5 seconds.  As his right foot came back to the floor, he slowly raised his fists in triumph, accompanied by a smile that lit the hearts of every spectator.  The crowd leapt to its feet with a deafening roar! Some people were crying. Some were smiling. Others stared with looks of amazement.  But, I knew in that moment that we all stood in appreciation and awe for having witnessed another human being’s courage, will and perseverance to achieve his personal best.  Rushing onto the floor, his coach wrapped him in a hug – he stood in her arms for several minutes soaking in the standing ovation.  Finally, she helped him back into the wheelchair and they exited the arena, leaving me, for one, feeling richly blessed.  (From an article written by Auburn Olympian Reita Clanton.) 

Our lives are filled with the 'feel good' stories.  We are encouraged to want to do better.  Our spirits are lifted to greater heights.  Experiences like this one force us to realize the things that are the most special.

Follow Your Instincts

There are many times when a choice has to be made and I hesitate because I'm not quite sure which direction I should go.  And I'm not necessarily talking about good versus bad.  Maybe the choice is good versus good.  Experience has shown that more times than not if I will follow my instinct, (God given gift) the decision I decide on ends up being what's best for me.
Our family attended Sacrament meeting today in West Jordan, Utah to listen to our niece as she spoke, prior to entering the Missionary Training Center, in Provo, Utah in two weeks as she embarks as a full-time missionary in the Indiana Indianapolis Mission.  She spoke of a church leader who counseled her to follow her instincts in relation to whether a mission was the right thing for her.  She spoke, today, with humility and gratitude.  We are excited for her opportunity to serve.
Each one of us has the opportunity to choose.  I hope that I will pay close attention to what my instinct says on any given days in my life.  God has built into each one of the us the ability to choose the things that we should do.  That internal compass will lead us to reach the potential that He knows we can.  The responsibility is ours and the rewards are great!