Saturday, January 14, 2012

When I Grow Up

Several months ago, our youngest boy, Danny, came tromping into the living room with my shoes on.  I don't have enormous feet but when you put a size eleven shoe on the feet of a seven year old they look huge.  I joked with him about how quickly his feet had grown in just a short amount of time.  He then stated the obvious by saying.  "Dad, these are your shoes, don't you know?" 
I gave some thought to that small window of time that I enjoyed with Dan.  I thought about doing the same exact thing with my dad's shoes and thinking to myself that one day I was going to grow up to be big. 
I am thankful for the opportunity to look forward with anticipation of things yet to come.
About seventeen years ago, Becky and I found out that we were expecting our first child.  It was an exciting time for us but also overwhelming.  To be a father was something I had hoped would happen to me.  I wanted to grow up and get married to a wonderful person. (I got the very best!)  I hoped with all of my heart that I would be able to have children.  That blessing has also come to pass for which I am grateful. 
Speaking of looking forward to things.  I thought about the time that passed during the pregnancy of our oldest son, Brady.  From the beginning of the pregnancy, I began dreaming that this baby boy would be born with Down Syndrome.  The dreams were some of the sweetest experiences I have ever enjoyed.  Life was rich with this cute little boy.  Our life didn't seem to skip a beat at all.  I enjoyed everything about him.  The pregnancy went well and the day quickly arrived when we would finally enjoy this new addition to our family.  It finally came time for Dr. Macy to deliver the baby.  The delivery went well and Dr. Macy assured us that we had a healthy baby boy.  I must have had a puzzled look on my face when she looked at me to deliver the exciting news.  "Is he okay?" I asked.  "Yes!"  Was her response.  As I looked at this new beautiful baby boy, I expected to see this beautiful boy with challenges that we would live with for the remainder of our lives.  I was relieved but also a bit saddened because I had dreamed about him for many months.  I was grateful to have a healthy baby. 
All I ever wanted to do was grow up and be happy.  I have been blessed in abundance.  I still feel like Danny walking in those big shoes, looking forward to the many great adventures and opportunities that lie ahead.  The shoes still feel like they have some growing room.  When the day finally comes that I grow into those shoes, I hope that I have done all that I can do.  Because after all is said and done, I want to grow up to be the best person I can be.