The Song From Your Heart

I have enjoyed good music my entire life.  The lyrics of a well-written song are meaningful and the melody of superb composition soothes the soul to its most inner core.
There are songs that are attached to memories that are very fond to me.
My younger brother, Gavin, was hospitalized with appendicitis, when he was a little boy.  Because I was unaware of whether his illness was severe, I worried horribly about his prognosis.  I was downstairs in our home and was very sad, and worried that somehow he was going to die.  I turned on the radio, hoping to find some comfort in some music.  A song came on and I listened carefully to it's words.

"You packed in the morning and I, stared out the window and I, struggled for something to say.  You left in the rain without closing the door, I didn't stand in your way.  But I miss you more than I, missed you before and now where I'll find comfort, God knows 'Cause you left me, just when I needed you most.  Now most every morning I, stare out the window and I, think about where you might be, I've written you letters, that I'd like to send, if you would just send one to me.'Cause I need you more than I, Needed before and now, where I'll find comfort, God knows. 'Cause you left me, just when I needed you most.  You packed in the morning I, stared out the window and I, struggled for something to say.
You left in the rain, without closing the door. I didn't stand in your way. Now I love you more than I, loved you before and now, where I'll find comfort, God knows. 'Cause you left me. Just when I needed you most. Oh, yeah you left me, just when I needed you most. You left me, just when I needed you most."

I heard that song as I was walking through the open market in Holland.  A flood of the feelings I felt on that day, many years prior, poured over me.
Today, our family visited with my grandpa.  During one portion of the conversation, a memory was shared about a time when grandpa and his older brother, Uncle Bud had sung a song.  Without hesitation my grandpa began to sing the song.  I will never forget that precious moment in time.

"In the little red school house,
With my book and slate,
In the little red school house,
I was always late.
I long to be back there where I was a scholar, in the days of yore.
How I'd stand right up there and hollar, "two and two are four".
When we should have been learning about the Golden Rule,
our little hearts were yearning for the swimming pool.
Oh how we'd sit and wait for the 4 o'clock bell,
the moment that we heard it we would run like...mad,
O golly gee, I want to be, in the little red school house.
Ten o'clock the spelling lessons just begun,
Johnny throws an ink ball just for fun.
Hits the teachers ear with an awful splat,
She turns around and says, "Who did that?"
Pretty little Percy in the very first row, raises up his hand and says, "Teacher, I know."
Little Johnny whispers to the teachers pride,
"You just wait till I get you outside."
Johnny's told to stand up with his face to the wall,
He says, "I don't wanna" and he tried to stall,
"If I stand up there I'll take an awful chance,
I've got a great big tear in the seat of my pants."
Teacher sends you home to wash your face and then,
you say, "Oh what's the use, it just gets dirty again."
Oh gee, I wanna be, in the little red school house."

There isn't anything better than the comfort of a song from the heart!

Last Words

It is interesting how quickly life passes.  Becky and I went and visited my mom's parents, in Orem, Utah.  They are getting older and their age limits what they can do.  We could see the frustration that they felt that there were many things they cannot do.  As we left their home, after giving them a hug and a kiss, I wondered how much longer they will live.  I loved on my grandpa and as I walked down the hallway, I felt in my heart that his days are numbered on this earth.  That caused me a little bit of sadness.  I visited with him, all alone, for about fifteen minutes and I told him that I loved him so much.
Take just a moment and think about your own family.  Go through and take an inventory of your relationship with each member and ask yourself, "Did I show, and tell each person that I loved them?" 
Because so much happens, in such a short amount of time, you can never be sure that there will be a 'next' time to see them and express your love for them, in this life.
Make the best of every moment.  The wonderful times spent with family will always create long-lasting memories that will always remain embedded in your heart and mind.

Truth Will Sustain

I enjoy Sunday, as it gives time of concentrated focus on the religious part of my life, which is the most important part to me.  Many months ago, a young man returned home from his service as a missionary for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, in Costa Rica.  His experience was rich with the love he shared with the people of his assigned 'field' of labor.  One comment that he made, has stuck with me.  He said that prior to his mission, he treated his innermost spiritual feelings, and actions, as a part of his life.  Upon his return, after two years of full-time missionary service, he came to realize, and understand, that it was his life.
Today, I spoke to a congregation of Hispanic members of the LDS church.  It was a meaningful experience for me.  I felt their love for me as I shared with them my personal feelings of knowledge I have gained.  This feels like a great opportunity to share a couple of those same truths.
Our Heavenly Father lives!  He loves us and in completely aware of all that we experience today, and every other day that will follow.  His Son, Jesus Christ, came to this earth because of the love He has for you and I.  His purpose, was a divine mission to fully understand and personally take upon Himself, all of the mistakes that the human family would and is currently making.  He knew all that we would do, and still fulfilled His mission.  Without Him, we are nothing.  It is only through Him that we may one day return back into the presence of our Father that we care about so deeply.
We are our Father's children and He loves us more than we can comprehend here in this mortal life.
These truths will sustain us through the trials we will face.  They are truth!  I am grateful for light and knowledge on this day of gladness.

One, Two, Or Three

We went this morning to watch as Danny played his final indoor soccer game.  It has been a lot of fun to watch and support him.  Their team is coached by a man who knows and understands the game of soccer.  He has spent practice time teaching the kids the fundamentals of the game.  He has taught them to know what they are doing, with each specific position, and why the player in a particular position does what they do.
I have long held out an opinion that many disagree with but I hope that you will try to understand the way I feel.
During my life, I have had the opportunity to participate is in many different things that, in the end, there are places by which the top participants are ranked.  As a young kid, that was a big deal to be one of the top people.
Some years ago, during the Summer Olympics, a commercial was aired wherein was showed a Bolivian power-lifter.  You know the guys with the humongous thighs that pick up the large bar with the huge weights on each side?  They have to lift it over their head and hold it for a required amount of time.  What stuck out to me was the fact that the 'power-lifter' wasn't necessarily the largest man, rather, he displayed 'guts of glory'.  He struggled to lift the weight over his head, but once he did, he held it strong and firm.  As the horn sounded to indicate that he had made the mandated time requirement, he dropped the large weight and began jumping up and down like a young excited kid on Christmas morning.  The reality is that all of the excitement was not for first place.  That final lift sealed up a third place finish which awarded him a bronze medal finish in the Summer Olympics.  That performance qualified him for a top-tier finish at the pinnacle of his career.
My opinion is this.  Why is it deeply ingrained in the minds of so many people that anything less than a first place finish is lacking?  I watched that power-lifter celebrate as if he had outdone all other competitors.  I believe that doing one's best has become lost in the determination to be the overall winner in everything.  Too much pressure is being placed on attaining a singular spot defined as 'winner'.
I am a firm believer in doing the best that you can.  Everyone has something that they can do better than somebody else.  That is the beauty of being individuals.  Ask yourself that in five years down the road, is anybody going to remember, or more importantly, even care that I won a Future Farmers of America jacket because I recited the FFA creed in front of the entire class?  And what if you are a player on a team that wins the NBA championship? 
Don't get me wrong.  Winning is very fun to do, but there is only one winner and what with everyone else that has also worked tirelessly? 
We want our kids to do the very best that they can do.  If they win...great!  If fourth place is their best...great!
I believe our focus has become a little blurred.  It's just my opinion, so hold onto the tomatoes. 

Disappointment

I have known disappointment in my own life. As a young man, I felt discouraged when times of disappointment came my way. It is important for me to interject that there haven't been but a few times in my life, when I was really disappointed.
There isn't a person who is exempt from this feeling. Because there is so much that happens in our lives, the time will come, for sure, when each of us encounters it 'up close and personal'.
When I was in seventh grade, I tried out for the school boy's basketball team. The try-outs for very productive. I worked really hard throughout the duration. The coach's commented on my 'hustling' play. You have to understand that from a coach's stand point, I was very small. I worked hard, on the first day. It came time for 'cuts'. A few players were dismissed. It was clear why those players were no longer invited to participate--they lacked the ability to work hard. I made the first day of 'cuts'. The second day was more regimented and various plays were practiced. I knew very little about the plays they practiced but I felt like my ability to work hard made up for my lack of knowledge. The end of the try-out came and we all knew that a few last players would be dismissed, trimming the squad down to the final team. The first name was called out and then the second. I was relieved that I was still sitting. I looked around at the remaining boys and figured that the last boy to go came down to me and one other boy. Time seemed to stand still as the head coach looked at his sheet clamped to the clipboard that he held in his hand. "Derek Fish." The two most undesired words in the English language, at that very moment, penetrated deep into my ears. I hesitated, momentarily, hoping that time would rewind and another name would be called out. That didn't happen and Coach Tornell gave me the dismissed look that he had given to the other boys. I had worked my hardest and the disappointment felt more like anger. I left the gymnasium with a gut-ache.
The story of not making the Junior High basketball team is not the emphasis of this writing. I allowed my disappointment to penetrate so deeply, that I didn't ever try out for another basketball team in Junior High or High School. What a shame that was for me to have allowed one experience, that didn't go my way, to interfere with the potential of trying again and eventually making a team.
The lesson is clear. Disappoint does not discriminate. It comes to all people. It will continue to come in our lives. It's up to each of us to learn from and then "try, try again."

Be Easy Going

A holiday was fast approaching and a particular man decided that a good gesture would be to do something special, on the holiday, for his young wife. With excitement, the man went to the store and purchased several small gifts as a token of his love for his wife with some spontaneity intertwined to make the holiday a fun occasion. His excitement built and the day finally arrived when the gifts he had purchased would be given to his lovely bride. The anticipation was great as he offered the small gifts. The look on her face was not what the young man had hoped it would be. In fact, her look was one of disgust. She uttered not a word but continued to unwrap the gifts, one by one, until all of the small gifts were opened. Her reaction of disappointment remained the entire time. She looked up at her young, and stunned, husband. "These are kind of stupid." Her punishing words were piercing. The young man stood speechless. The awkward silence continued for a few moments and then the young man walked away. That happened many years ago, and it is the last gift the man ever gave to his wife.
The first time I heard my friend tell me of his experience, my first reaction was one of disbelief. It seemed fabricated. The many years have passed but the open wound still exists. I believe that the hurt is real but at some point in time, the hurt needs to be set aside and my friend needs to move on.
The fact still remains that the tongue is an enemy. The words that exit out of the mouth need to be well thought out. I hold out hope that everything I say to Becky is kind and fun-natured. One of the damaging things people do in a relationship is speak thoughtless words to the one that they love the very most.
Being a good sport is a wonderful thing. To be easily entertained is also respectable.

Our "A" Team

Becky and I went for a short ride in the van, last night. We have enjoyed going for "rides" since our days of dating. It allows us the chance to visit about the things that are going on in life. We have spent a fair amount of time trying to solve the world's problems.  It is therapeutic for both of us to talk things through and to be in one another's company.
As we visited, last night, I felt so grateful for our family. I thought about Becky and all that she means to me in my life. She has been that joy, to me, for a long time now. The words that she speaks to me are soothing--her touch brings me great comfort. I love her more than words can adequately express. Our children bring us immense joy and there is a fulfillment that we get because of their goodness. I am so grateful that I have the opportunity to be a father. Parenthood is enriching. There isn't a day that passes that I don't thank heaven for the rich blessing of rearing children and teaching them the ways of truth and right. I am trying to be a stalwart example of somebody that in good and that they can look up to for solid guidance and unwavering direction. It is sure that they will get that by looking at their mother. She defines goodness.
It is in our home that I receive safety from the winds and storms of life. It is where stability resides. It is a place where I can be myself, all of the time. I can't thank my family enough for the love that I feel for each one of them. They are trying so hard to be good people. I recognize that they are not perfect, but neither am I, so they are in good company. All Becky and I have ever desired is that our kids work hard to make this world a better place to live in. We hope that they will treat others will love and respect. That isn't the easiest task. It takes patience and practice.
The family is an eternal unit, ordained of God. The organization of it is vitally important. Many families don't enjoy the feelings of which I previously spoke. I is the desire of my heart that more emphasis will be placed on the strengthening of the family unit in homes across the world. All other distractions should be set aside if they intrude on the family. I try to properly balance the business of life so that the time I spend with our family is meaningful and worthwhile.
The energy and time we invest in our family should be the best efforts that we have. There will be no greater opportunities to build and strengthen relationships than the time you spend with your family.