Be Easy Going

A holiday was fast approaching and a particular man decided that a good gesture would be to do something special, on the holiday, for his young wife. With excitement, the man went to the store and purchased several small gifts as a token of his love for his wife with some spontaneity intertwined to make the holiday a fun occasion. His excitement built and the day finally arrived when the gifts he had purchased would be given to his lovely bride. The anticipation was great as he offered the small gifts. The look on her face was not what the young man had hoped it would be. In fact, her look was one of disgust. She uttered not a word but continued to unwrap the gifts, one by one, until all of the small gifts were opened. Her reaction of disappointment remained the entire time. She looked up at her young, and stunned, husband. "These are kind of stupid." Her punishing words were piercing. The young man stood speechless. The awkward silence continued for a few moments and then the young man walked away. That happened many years ago, and it is the last gift the man ever gave to his wife.
The first time I heard my friend tell me of his experience, my first reaction was one of disbelief. It seemed fabricated. The many years have passed but the open wound still exists. I believe that the hurt is real but at some point in time, the hurt needs to be set aside and my friend needs to move on.
The fact still remains that the tongue is an enemy. The words that exit out of the mouth need to be well thought out. I hold out hope that everything I say to Becky is kind and fun-natured. One of the damaging things people do in a relationship is speak thoughtless words to the one that they love the very most.
Being a good sport is a wonderful thing. To be easily entertained is also respectable.

Our "A" Team

Becky and I went for a short ride in the van, last night. We have enjoyed going for "rides" since our days of dating. It allows us the chance to visit about the things that are going on in life. We have spent a fair amount of time trying to solve the world's problems.  It is therapeutic for both of us to talk things through and to be in one another's company.
As we visited, last night, I felt so grateful for our family. I thought about Becky and all that she means to me in my life. She has been that joy, to me, for a long time now. The words that she speaks to me are soothing--her touch brings me great comfort. I love her more than words can adequately express. Our children bring us immense joy and there is a fulfillment that we get because of their goodness. I am so grateful that I have the opportunity to be a father. Parenthood is enriching. There isn't a day that passes that I don't thank heaven for the rich blessing of rearing children and teaching them the ways of truth and right. I am trying to be a stalwart example of somebody that in good and that they can look up to for solid guidance and unwavering direction. It is sure that they will get that by looking at their mother. She defines goodness.
It is in our home that I receive safety from the winds and storms of life. It is where stability resides. It is a place where I can be myself, all of the time. I can't thank my family enough for the love that I feel for each one of them. They are trying so hard to be good people. I recognize that they are not perfect, but neither am I, so they are in good company. All Becky and I have ever desired is that our kids work hard to make this world a better place to live in. We hope that they will treat others will love and respect. That isn't the easiest task. It takes patience and practice.
The family is an eternal unit, ordained of God. The organization of it is vitally important. Many families don't enjoy the feelings of which I previously spoke. I is the desire of my heart that more emphasis will be placed on the strengthening of the family unit in homes across the world. All other distractions should be set aside if they intrude on the family. I try to properly balance the business of life so that the time I spend with our family is meaningful and worthwhile.
The energy and time we invest in our family should be the best efforts that we have. There will be no greater opportunities to build and strengthen relationships than the time you spend with your family.

Move Forward

During a recent conversation, I shared my feelings with a man about the importance of maintaining 'forward' in his life. The opposite, backward, fosters feelings of discouragement and inadequacy.
Let's talk about this for a minute and let me share some of the feelings I shared with this man.
Life is set up in a 'forward' pattern. A day begins and it moves forward until it's end. The hands of a clock move forward-- first a second, then a minute, hour and finally a day. A baby is born as an infant child. Over time, that infant grows and ends up as a full-grown adult. That is the general nature of our lives. Throughout each of our lives, we learn and grown by facing the various 'up's and down's' of life. It is a purely, operated plan. It seems that the human mind digresses when times of discouragement or hardship hit, otherwise we all seem to long to move forward.
Our mindset needs to gravitate more heavily toward the 'forward' direction of life. Life's challenges are easier to face, and ultimately overcome, with the realization that to move forward will allow the conquering of them. Much will be learned because we face these obstacles, that show of what substance our character really is made.
There isn't a single person that doesn't have an 'uphill' battle.
As a young boy, the Boy Scouts of America allowed outdoor opportunities of fun and adventure. Our scout troop went to Yosemite National Park several times. The joy of hiking was thrilling to us boys. We got to hike to places like Half Dome and El Capitan.  These hikes were not the simplest, but the reward of arriving at the destination was exhilarating! Throughout the hike, my legs burned and I longed to complete the journey. Upon arrival, the hard work paid off and I was glad to have endured the hard work that was required to enjoy the destination.
We often forget the same attitude that I had in Yosemite. We cannot see the end of life, right now, but one day we will. Our focus must remain on the journey currently at hand. We must focus and then focus again, reminding ourselves that just around the corner is the greatest 'pay-off' we can ever imagine.
Our goal is in the 'forward' direction. We don't need to ever look back. The spindle of our divine potential points forward.
The beauty of our Half Dome awaits us up ahead. With a steadfast resolve to remain focused, that beauty will touch and enrich our lives and will make all that we do eternally worthwhile.

Knowledge Is Power

I am so grateful for knowledge. There are many types of knowledge but I wish to focus on the knowledge that we will use use not just for now but forever. I am reminded of a personal experience I had while serving my mission. I was in the Missionary Training Center at the time. I was attending an evening class where we were 'role playing' a teaching experience. My companion and I were teaching one of our instructors. I will never forget that opportunity. That was a turning point for me in my missionary service. This experience gave me the confidence that I needed, in a new situation, in different and unfamiliar territory. I was asked to teach the Joseph Smith Story. During the teaching experience, my heart was touched by the spirit and my entire body was overcome with a feeling of warmth and love. I gained a witness of the absolute truthfulness of the story of the boy, Joseph Smith. I knew that his account was exactly like he said it was. During that teaching time, I came to know that my calling as a full-time missionary of my Heavenly Father was inspired. In each of our lives, we come to understand, first-hand, the importance of our divine nature as sons and daughters of our Heavenly Father. We all will face the challenges that come with mortality. Our bodies will endure various sicknesses and adversity. Our Father in Heaven is well aware of what we face. In fact, in a time long ago, we were excited to come to earth and face the challenges that would accompany us through this mortal journey. We were overjoyed by the prospect of this opportunity. No matter what we face, it will be alright. Several years ago, Becky faced some unknown medical challenges. She would be about her daily activities and suddenly pass out, without any warning. This went on for many years. I was attending college classes, every day and working the night shift. I arrived home at 12:30 AM and everything looked very normal for this early morning hour. When I opened the back door, our dog Rascal jumped abruptly up on me. I quickly petted him and he ran swiftly to the downstairs familyroom. I could tell that there was something amiss. From the top of the stairs, I could see that Becky had passed out, sometime during the evening. Her neck was crimped to the side as she had fallen up against a wall of the room. I wondered in the moment if I was going to lose her and I thought about what I would do next with our two young daughters. The experiences we face are daunting. Our Father will never leave us alone! I am grateful for the things that make me strong. I am thankful for the opportunity of life. Our understanding was completely clear, at a previous time. We will understand everything, with clarity, once again. For now, faith and endurance is the requirement. Everything will be alright!

Speak, He Is Listening

"Heavenly Father, are you really there?  And do you hear and answer ev'ry child's prayer?  Some say that heaven is far away,  But I feel it close around me as I pray.  Heavenly Father, I remember now Something that Jesus told disciples long ago:  "Suffer the children to come to me." Father, in prayer I'm coming now to thee.  Pray, he is there. Speak, he is list'ning. You are his child; His love now surrounds you. He hears your prayer; He loves the children. Of such is the kingdom, the kingdom of heav'n." (A Child's Prayer)

I have known, from the time I was very young, that prayer is a powerful and useful tool, to help us throughout our lives.  From as far back as I can remember, prayer was offered in our home many times throughout any given day.  It was obvious that my parents believed that it was important.  I have heard my mom and my dad pray for me and specifically ask that God bless me in every facet of my life.
When I was nineteen, and just getting down to the last two weeks before leaving on my mission, I recall asking my dad for help because I felt confused and overwhelmed.  I was nervous about leaving to go on my mission, although I knew that my decision to go was good and right.  Dad's answer to me, was prayer.  He took the time to pray with me and even gave me several Priesthood blessings.  Looking back on that time, he knew that God was well aware of the feelings I was having and my dad knew that He would help me.  He did help me and He has helped me many times since then for which I am most grateful!
There isn't anything that we can't pray about.  He is our Father, and He will help us.  There is no doubt in my mind.  He is there and He is listening. 

A Lesson From A Young Girl

I'm not sure why this memory popped into my mind but it's a great one to share.  Years ago, Natalie was hospitalized with an illness.  We are so blessed to have Primary Children's Medical Center right here in Salt Lake City, Utah.  It is a premiere hospital in the United States, with 'cutting edge'  medical knowledge, specifically for children.
I left Natalie's room and went to the cafeteria to get something to eat.  As I walked down the hallway, I noticed the many children, in the different rooms, with their own various health struggles.  I walked by one particular room and as I passed by, the young child occupying that room looked right at me.  Her eyes were gentle and a large smile enveloped her face and I knew at that moment that my heart had been touched to the very core.  I was impressed that even during the difficult time, for this child, there was still room for happiness that she shared with me.  It made 'our situation' seem very small.
There are angels around us who watch out for us and help in times of need.  I believe that those angels are members of our family, friends that care for our well-being, and neighbors that just want to do something thoughtful and nice.  They are busy doing good because it's the right thing to do, nothing more and nothing less.  I believe that acts of kindness are happening all the time.  
When you think that you are the only one with struggles and challenges, remember that there are others who are burdened with things much greater than your own.  They are like the young child in the hospital, that through the pains and struggles of mortality, was able and willing to give me, a total stranger, a smile of encouragement that everything was going to be alright.
No matter the challenge, there is the surety that everything will work out.  That has been true in every situation in my life.  It will continue to be true because that's the way it was designed to be.    

Do My Best

From the time I was a young boy, I heard my parents say on many occasions to 'remember who you are.' I tried to live by that but made some mistakes along the way. As a grown man, that phrase is a big deal to me. It doesn't mean that perfection is required, it means that I try my very best.
As a young boy, I received a pump pellet gun. If you pumped it ten or twelve times, you could do some serious damage to anything that you would hit. I would go out into the cattle corral and shoot sparrows from atop the barn. I shot many birds that the farmers in our small community found to be a nuisance. My mom had told me that robins were off-limits to shoot. I was alone, one afternoon, and noticed a large nest neatly positioned in a lilac bush. I didn't think much about it until I saw the head of a robin sitting in the nest. To this day, I still can't figure out what possessed me to act on something I knew to be wrong. I positioned my pellet gun toward the nest and 'sighted up' the robin. With the head of the robin positioned squarely in the sights of the rifle, I depressed the trigger and awaited the fatal consequence of my poor decision.  As if my first choice wasn't bad enough I walked toward the nest and waited for a few minutes. Just as I had hoped, the other parent robin flew into the nest. When one poor decision is put into motion, another is likely to follow. Before all was said and done, I had consciously slaughtered an entire family of beautiful robins.
It is one of the lessons of life that makes me feel bad whenever I think about it.
I hold out hope that the decisions I make, now, will allow those who love me the most, to know that I am trying to do my best.
Sometimes there are situations when I have to think that if I were to make a particular decision, would the consequences directly impact Becky and our children in a negative light?  Would my parents approve of my choices?  What about Becky's parents and my siblings?  Would the 'ripples' of poor decision-making continue for a very long time, thus inhibiting the progress toward the eternal goals I am trying to attain?
Fortunately, lessons give me valuable teaching opportunities. In all situations, I remember the phrase that my parents often used--'remember who you are.' It has kept me out of shady situations before and will continue to do so as I follow its wise counsel.